Meandering back
Feb. 3rd, 2007 09:13 amIn the Spring of 1990 my first lover Eddie died after being really sick for a long time. When he finally let go there was a huge amount of sadness and loss but also the feeling of infinite possibility. I felt like a new person, not the person I was when I had met him but the person I'd become during my time with him.
Lesson 1: old habits die hard.
Around that same time we got an internet connection in my office. It wasn't corporate, it was just our "advanced development group", but it got me internet email and newsgroups. I was introduced to the Bear's Mailing List and to the usenet group soc.motss. Whatever I might say about them overall in retrospect, the positives were a sudden and delightful connection to group of smart, funny, sharp-tongued, challenging people.
And they, in general, welcomed me (in their own way.) The BML was a way to meet people here and in other places but those connections spun off into email. soc.motss was.... a bubbling cauldron filled with lava and honey and fluffy cotton candy and whiny tears and sharp commentary from some really smart, clued-in people.
For me, who had moved to a new town, met someone, lived with him for 5 years, and saw our friends sort of drift away (or maybe I pushed them away because of the associations...) this was incredibly live-giving to me and filled me with what looked like actual things that could be possible that I hadn't had in a long time.
Two (well-liked? often-funny? commented-on-everything? envied? fun?) people there somehow decided (or it was going to be decided for them, or something) that even though they hadn't met, they would become conceptually married and so The Conceptual Wedding was scheduled for 9/17/91 at Steve Dyer's house in Cambridge. Of of the wedding party is![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
vasilatos, the other was JoJo, at that time living in Paris.
You can findvasilatos's write up of the evening here.
Steve Dyer, snapping away:
( Join us. )
Lesson 1: old habits die hard.
Around that same time we got an internet connection in my office. It wasn't corporate, it was just our "advanced development group", but it got me internet email and newsgroups. I was introduced to the Bear's Mailing List and to the usenet group soc.motss. Whatever I might say about them overall in retrospect, the positives were a sudden and delightful connection to group of smart, funny, sharp-tongued, challenging people.
And they, in general, welcomed me (in their own way.) The BML was a way to meet people here and in other places but those connections spun off into email. soc.motss was.... a bubbling cauldron filled with lava and honey and fluffy cotton candy and whiny tears and sharp commentary from some really smart, clued-in people.
For me, who had moved to a new town, met someone, lived with him for 5 years, and saw our friends sort of drift away (or maybe I pushed them away because of the associations...) this was incredibly live-giving to me and filled me with what looked like actual things that could be possible that I hadn't had in a long time.
Two (well-liked? often-funny? commented-on-everything? envied? fun?) people there somehow decided (or it was going to be decided for them, or something) that even though they hadn't met, they would become conceptually married and so The Conceptual Wedding was scheduled for 9/17/91 at Steve Dyer's house in Cambridge. Of of the wedding party is
vasilatos, the other was JoJo, at that time living in Paris. You can find
vasilatos's write up of the evening here.Steve Dyer, snapping away:
( Join us. )
